Such a Fickle Monkey

Now the Rage Monkey is taking their sweet time while we’re filled with anxiety.


Well, I’m 36 weeks pregnant and still counting. A little over three weeks ago, all the medical professionals and most of our friends and family were convinced that we’d have a baby out in the world by now. But nooooo. If my preterm labor has taught me anything–other than I have a shocking lack of modesty and an uncanny ability to remain snarky in the hospital–it’s that the Rage Monkey is a little too much like their mother already. This little monkey will do things on THEIR time and ONLY their time when they’re damn well ready! No sooner and no later. After all, as my mother’s first child, I was 16 days early and then kept her in labor for hours… so, like mother, like monkey.

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On Courage

“Having courage does not mean we are unafraid. Having courage and showing courage mean we face our fears. We are able to say, I have fallen, but I will get up.” – Maya Angelou

Pregnant women are no strangers to courage. No matter what the outcome of a pregnancy is, the woman faced with it is brave and courageous. Deciding to have a child after never wanting one takes courage. Deciding to have an abortion, a scary enough procedure without hateful protesters threatening women outside of clinics, takes courage. Deciding to try to get pregnant in the face of terrible odds because of infertility takes courage. Deciding to give a child up for adoption takes courage. Deciding to get pregnant again after multiple traumatizing miscarriages takes courage. Even just being an average healthy person deciding to carry a pregnancy to term takes courage because anything can happen to anyone. Women still die from childbirth, and babies still die before being born. The partners, family, and friends who stand by these women also carry with them their own kind of bravery and courage–this whole “creating life” endeavor is filled with uncertainty and fear, which means it requires courage to pursue.

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Body Anxiety

… or lack thereof…

img_1415One of the things that being pregnant does is lead you to an array of online and print pieces talking about all things pregnancy, as well as hearing about all your family and friends’ experiences, ranging from what kept them alive during the first trimester to what they felt most comfortable wearing late in their third trimester. One of the things that I wasn’t expecting, however, was the overwhelming amount of body anxiety–and anxiety about having body anxiety–that I’ve encountered.

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